Tuesday, January 22, 2008

He's Just Not Into You - Revisited

So about a year ago I wrote this post and I have to admit it was one of my favourites. A friend of mine has questioned me on some of my assertions and so here is what I have to say. I made the statement that "If he is dating someone else he's just not into you." The main reason I think that girls have difficulty with that is for some reason we refuse to give up hope. Most girls as Suzy pointed out are willing to wait out a girlfriend under the belief that they are much better suited and eventually the guy in question will come to that realization. This false sense of hope is usually bolster by the actions of the guy in question. Guys in general are always looking for the next best thing. Even if the have the greatest thing in the world, they'll still keep an eye out for other possibilities. So he may call you or text you tease you or flirt, but at the end of the day he is still going home to someone else. The best and only option is to forget him and just move on. It's his loss not yours.

I think the biggest obstacle to recognizing that he is just not into you is a guy who possesses superficial charm. This is the guy that is super smooth and always tries to be engaging, charming, and slick. He is never shy or self-conscious and is not afraid to say anything. He is also quite cunning and manipulative and has learned exactly what to say and do to achieve his aim. He can be very difficult to identify as over the years he has managed to conceal his horns and his tail. Because he calls and remembers little details about you that may tell you he is interested but in what still needs to be determined. Taking it slow and getting to know someone is really the only way to truly decipher what a guy's interest is. For the most part the superficial charmer will not hang around too long and when he departs you should thank your lucky stars and do not even consider looking back.

There's more, but I'm tired (maybe later)

1 comment:

Suzy said...

Hey there u.
Ok. Good analysis... Most of those guys are verrrrry smooth (then again why else would women be attracted to him if he WASNT)..I am not sure if the guy has horns and tail because the fact that he takes pleasure in flirting is NO SIN. Both sexes do it. Why dont people just learn to not be so starved of affection, and the first bit of attention they get they think the guy likes them! 90% of the time, if a guy likes you and wants to get with you its NOT HARD TO FIGURE..no mind games there. Lets just stop being desperate, elevate our self esteem and know that we deserve our own MAN.