An Interesting Night

Seeing that he wasn't at work yesterday, I gave him a call and asked him to meet at a coffee shop before my class. There are those times when you're about to say something and you know its going to sound stupid regardless of how you say it. So I went with "I'm really focused on school, that's my priority and I am just not ready to be in a relationship right now" (what a cop-out); it should have been more like "I don't really care to invest any more time or energy because, I know you're not what I want, so why waste my time" or "I'm tired of your prodding and pushing, if this was meant to be it wouldn't take such effort.". I didn't bother with "let’s be friends", "I'll always love you" or "you'll always have a special place in my heart". He is a great guy and a good friend, but I think if I'd tried to get any of that trite out of my mouth, I'd have thrown up (regurgitating standard phrases has the ability to unsettle my stomach). I would like to believe that we were thinking along the same lines, especially with the pronounced distance lately, but I'm not too sure.

The night didn't end there, one of my classmates asked me out for coffee after class. He seems to be a really "nice guy", but I thought why jump “out of the frying pan, into the fire” (I declined). I than called a friend (initially, I had tried to steal him from his best friend, but that endeavour was quickly deserted as I have a very short attention span, which results in the title of friend and not best friend (I may one day take up my quest again, once life is a little more settled)) and asked a favour that was graciously granted. Finally, I called "My Confidant". He seemed overly concerned about my safety, which had me somewhat befuddled, as he's just not that kind of guy (it made a little more sense when I got home and caught the 1 am showing of the Nancy Grace show). He stayed on the phone until I was safely in the company of my brother and secured a promise I would call him the next time I'm out there waiting for my bus.

All in all an interesting night.